Thursday, December 09, 2004

Crack Kills!

I recently went out for drinks with an old flame from last year. We didn’t work out when we were dating because I was on one emotional playing field, and all he wanted to do was play the field.

But it seems his priorities have now changed, and he wanted to run an idea by me.

“I think I’m going to be single for life,” he said.

“Why is that?” I asked.

“I just have too much on my plate. I’ve got this promotional company going. I’m getting grants for my organization. I just bought a five-unit apartment building. And I’m thinking about going back to school to get my PhD.”

“Wow. That is a lot,” I said.

“But I think I’m ready to be a father, so I’m looking for a ‘baby-mama.’ Are you interested?”

Damn. How’s that for trifling? He’s too busy for a wife, but wants to have a child. Go figure?

I translate his message as follows:

I’m not interested in a wife. But I like the idea of having a child. The only problem is that I don’t really have time to raise one. So, I need a woman to raise the baby for me. I’ll come around and be a daddy when the feeling hits me. Other than that, I’ll just send cash from time to time.

My message to him…Lay off the pipe, ‘cause crack kills!

7 Comments:

At 1:36 PM, Blogger backspacer said...

wait. how much would you get in child support?

ok. just kidding. hehe. gotta keep it *simple* right mama?

 
At 1:44 PM, Blogger Rod said...

Nice translation! I don't think he's on crack, he just thinks too much of himself. Probably thinks a woman should be tearfully great full just for carrying his man-seed.
One thing interests me though. Did you answer with a NO? I know you think he's on crack and all, but some women think they can change a man!

 
At 1:49 PM, Blogger Monkey said...

I also enjoyed the translation!
Nice to meet you!

 
At 2:02 PM, Blogger JustMe said...

Yes, Rod, my answer was 'no.' And I gave him a very reserved piece of my mind...just enough to let him know those aren't the kinds of requests you make to a woman of my caliber, ya know! :-) I'm way too classy to just be a 'baby-mama'. Even if I find myself in a situation where I'm raising a child alone, I at least want the comfort of knowing that child was conceived in love and not out of convenience.

 
At 4:51 PM, Blogger Worried Boyfriend said...

so true! the nerve of him asking to be an absentee father! BOOOOOOOO. Welcome back though!

 
At 3:15 PM, Blogger Jdid said...

whoa dude is definetly feeling himself. yep he definetly needs to lay off that pipe. thats hilarious. he's not ready to be a father he's just ready to be a sperm doner. he wants to see if hs boys can swim.

 
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